Last Updated:

Important Things to Discuss Before Marriage

Contributor
Contributor Lifestyle

Before getting into marriage, there are things that two need to discuss before committing to each other. It is best that you discuss exhaustively all issues you think can affect your marriage. These issues need to be discussed with all honesty. Don’t leave any issue pending; it could be the one that will break your marriage.

The following are the four main things, including many others that you should also discuss before marriage.

1. Finances

Money is a major factor in any marriage that any couple needs to discuss before committing to marriage. You need to discuss how you will be contributing finances towards the family expenses.

You need to agree on duties and responsibilities. Also, discuss how you can help each other on those duties if one party is not in a position to. You can opt to put all the money on the table and divide it towards the family expenses or share responsibilities and expenses.

You also need to discuss unfortunate instances. For instance, can your marriage stand if  there is no money?  Ask yourselves these questions. What happens if the both of you don’t have money? Can the marriage stand amidst financial constraints?

Read also: Essentials of a healthy relationship. 

2. Relatives and In-Laws

You need to consider relatives from both sides, since they are also part of your family. From time to time, both of you need to support parents and siblings. It could be paying school fees for the siblings or supporting parents with basic needs. Sit down and agree how much you will be contributing to assist parents from both sides. Consider which family is in dire need when deciding. 

You need also to agree on how long you can host relatives in your home. This needs to be done in all fairness and it shouldn’t be one-sided. For instance, if relatives from the wife’s side can visit for a month, it should be the same case with those of the husband. 

3. Number of Children

Children are an important factor in any marriage. You need to agree on the number of children you want to have. You also need to discuss a situation where you are not in a position to bear children. Can you survive the marriage without a child? If you differ on the number of children, it is best that you strike a balance.

Find options on instances when you cannot bear children. Can adopting a child be an option? Also, figure out if you two can live together in peace without a child. 

4. Religion and Beliefs

Religion and beliefs play an important role in our lives. It is important that you discuss your beliefs and what you would want to instill in your children. For instance, if the two of you have different faiths, it is important that you agree on which one you will be following.

You also need to agree on what belief or faith you would like your children to follow. One of you must be willing to compromise their faith and follow that of the other. If that is not possible, figure out if both of you can live in peace while still holding on to different faiths.

Read also: How to plan a cheap wedding in Kenya. 

Final Word

It is important that before you can commit to each other you discuss finances, religion, relatives, and the number of children. These issues need to be discussed candidly and with all honesty. Failure to agree on these issues will result in conflict later in the marriage. You must be ready to compromise and strike a balance since you won't agree on all issues.